Friday, March 4, 2011

Meditations on Strength.

I'm starting to think that at the very least, this infertility journey has brought me a new level of empathy that I never had before. I try to remind myself of this every time someone says something that is insensitive. They don't know any better, I tell myself. Just like I didn't know any better before it happened to us. 

Some part of me wants to list the insensitivities so I can purge them from my head, but it would only fuel the fire of my irritation. And that's just not what I need today. 

Today I need strength. I need the strength to go forward, to look forward, to think positive. To smile and calmly educate when someone says something I find ignorant. To resist the urge to lose my cool when my husband doesn't do exactly what I want him to do. To laugh and squeal when my best friend tells me her baby-to-be is a girl, just like she hoped. 

This is our journey. This is our life. I have to make it what I can. For me. For us. 

Today, I want to make it positive. I want it to be for....something.

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